i've grown amazingly fond of my tumblr;

blogger, pls don't hate me.
while i'm on the subject of moving on, i have decided that i will end 2010 by inking myself.
my very good friend and i will be in SF for new years, but oakland for the the 30th. on this day we will be inking ourselves with inspirations from our respective worlds.
i am quite excited for mine, seeing as how my piercings didn't work out.
in any case, yay!
i have also decided that my 2010 was well-lived. i had a good feeling about that one, and i was right! i have a good feeling about 2011 as well.
i cannot wait to ring in the new year! this will be my first time choosing 100% what to do, and i have to say i am quite excited.
freedom is a hard fought battle. i owe myself this one.

"i hope someday very soon, we can all meet for a drink and be great friends."

that's what i'd like to think my nights are like in SF.
most of the time, it's just me and her. we hang out. doesn't matter with who, we just do.
we go to random gallery openings, housewarmings in the mission, dancing at bootie...
and we meet random people. we make friends. we make friends with the city.
every time, the airplane rides... are worth it.

"the world is made up of two types of women. the simple girls, and the katie girls."
i don't knw why the fuck i do things, and i never learn from my mistakes.

"i thought by the time i got here, i would know what to say."

"party's over. i'll say it is."
"why wasn't it me?"

"your girl is lovely, hubble."

watching this episode gives me hope. yes, i am that crazy girl. i do things on a whim, and i am nothing but simple.
but in the end, she ends up with big.
i want to end up with a big.
for the jaded, cynical bitch that i am...

"i don't get it."
"and you never did."

"then i had a thought. maybe i didn't break big. maybe the problem was, he couldn't break me."
"maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. maybe they need to run free until they find somebody just as wild to run with."

the scary part is, the older i get... the older the men get. i went to a housewarming party yesterday of four bachelors. their bachelor pad. in SF, in the mission.

if i could describe their place in one word, it would definitely be "fabulous!"

stainless steel kitchen, light wooden floors... space, high ceilings, glass windows that reached the length of a wall... spacious rooms, inviting atmosphere.

i want to get there someday. on my own. i want to live on my own in a place like that someday. where people go up the stairs to reach their destination. where destination overlooks a city. the city. the city by the bay. san francisco.

SO not in the mood.

- so not in the mood to be finishing this damn paper.
- so not in the mood to continue being nice.
- so not in the mood to care what the FUCK people think about me.
- so not in the mood to be in LA.
- so not in the mood to go back to work tomorrow.
- so not in the mood to HANDLE. i want to start ENJOYING.
- so not in the mood to continue being "strong."
- so not in the mood for christmas.

i am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO looking forward to the end of the next two weeks. thank GOD i have SF this weekend to tide me over. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

things that make me upchuck:

- bitches 'n hos. no, seriously.
- when i leave papers to do for myself last minute.
- not having money.
- confused little boys.
- my house mate's dog.
- stinginess.
- boredom.
- wannabe ___s.


i think that about completes my list. well, the characteristics that i can think of right now anyway.
i really don't want to edit this paper... then write three more. aweeesome!

dancing machine ~

so i rarely do anything for my birthday, so i thought a vegas trip was in order to remedy that.
things did not turn out as I expected, but i have to say... i had a mighty fine tiime!!
oh man.
- the djs: REALLY? last time i was at vegas, the music was just horrible! tao & xs were the worst. this time? AOKI, OAKENFOLD, AND FELIX. what's up. i ... was going crazy. i have to say i enjoyed felix the most. man. badASS mixes. made my heart pounddddddd.
- the boys: HELLO, RAIN! love love LOVED the international crowd. i love that electronica can bring us all together <3. most exotic of the night? meeting a man/boy (late 20s? haha) from georgia... the COUNTRY! long ways to have fun, i think! of course, saw some aussies. i think they are always at vegas. i never have a vegas trip without seeing/speaking with some aussies. party animalzz.
- the drinks. strong, cheap, and free. just how i love it ;)
- being in a bed with a close friend for a whole day due to exhaustion/stomach flu. oh the conversations we had... <3
- the food: best bruschettas i've ever had at wolfgang puck pizzeria. DAYUM. & hot, legit pho after a night of drinking on a cloudy day? yes pls!
- the entertainment: adored HP7. LOVED the jabbawockeez show @ the monte carlo, & thoroughly enjoyed the fire show/acrobatics in RAIN. O_O
i... need to go again.
bahaha.
delirious &.... checking out. good night!

old habits

die hard.
i have a bad habit of taking my laptop to school.
it all started when i just HAD to watch the giants games online when they were on tues/thurs (THANK YOU, ATDHE!).
and then it evolved into "well, this class is boring anyway." <-- which it truly was.
then it became, "oh shiiii i need my laptop!!"
i am taking a very useful course with a very sound professor called ... i forget what it's called, but it's all about couple's therapy. i should be paying extra attn to this class because i will be doing... MARITAL counseling...
he has a skeleton of his lectures on a powerpoint online. i can fill out the blanks on my own, right..?
read the textbooks, email him with relevant questions...
who am i kidding??
ack! crisis!

T.O.M.

i hate the TIME OF THE MONTH.
or before it, actually.
i have nonsensical thoughts about things that i probably don't even WANT.
hence, i drive myself crazy.
maybe i should just get a dog...

giant

"you picked a good year to follow the giants... and people can't even call you a bandwagon fan because you started following them in the regular season when they were behind the padres."
-- classmate nate
got me thinking. . .
i think i have a giant annoyance with people that compare me to everyone else for several reasons; i have one, though, in particular that i think is very important.
in the course of history, the masses never had it right.
to be "like everyone else" was never a celebration.
the fad was never wise.
there was always ONE person who actually thought to start anything that was RIGHT. see martin luther king jr., martin luther, rosa parks, henry david thoreau. they were never popular. they were never LIKE anyone else. they were actually very UNpopular. People didn't necessarily LIKE them. People became very UNcomfortable with them.
i want to be great. i have great plans for myself. i don't want to be like everyone else.
i want to follow the greats and be a thinker. people may not like me, that's fine. as long as i live by my convictions, i can say that i have been honest with myself & have embraced the life as i live it.
maybe i am being pretentious. maybe i am reaching for too much.
i have one life.
why the hell not!? :)

Is there ever a good time to be listening to James Blunt?

why so serious?

i am really lovin' my long hair, but not lovin' the amount of time it takes to dry it.
blow drying my hair is out of the question at this moment because it is 1:16am &my room is closest to my parents' room in which they are currently resting their eyes.
GG :(

"As Keats wrote, '[d]o you not see how necessary a World of Pains and troubles is to school an intelligence and make it a soul?'"

so when i'm happy i'm happy, and when i'm sad i'm developing... into a more conscious & beautiful human being.
could i ever go wrong?

happy IV

i'm really glad i was never wrongfully accused of a crime so heinous that i would have to serve my whole life in jail for a crime i never committed.

POWW!

in a really strange funk.
don't even want to interview tomorrow, but gotta PULL THROUGH.
i think a good 90% of life is bucking up & wading through the shit that is life.
the only difference between you & me is that i DEFINITELY have a light at the end of the tunnel.
heh.
herrre's to the ups, downs, and inbetweens of our livesssssssssss.
yessir!

happy III

when i lived up north, i was always looking back at what i left in LA.
at that point, i missed the friends i grew up with for 7 years, a good chunk of my life at 12.
i missed korea town & its amazing food/cafes/attractions.
i missed the warm weather.
i missed what seemed like "diversity."
now that i have come back down from living up north, i realize...
i miss the friends i grew up with for 9 years, a good chunk of my life at 22.
i miss san francisco & its amazing food/cafes/attractions.
i miss the cold weather.
i miss the diversity.
how strange it is that i am feeling the same things, but not feeling the same things.
in either case, i am slowly learning. i am learning that as humans, we are made to be sub creators. because we were made in the image of God, with characteristics like our Father, we were also made to produce and finish tasks to what we deem "good."
and in my life down here, as uncomfortable as i find myself, i am still building-- building friendships, a career, a life. ... & in and through that, i am always thankful. 

happy II

"Hi grace, <3 love you and hope you have a wonderful day! :)"
Jessica Tang, Sent 7:58AM

"Listening to the replay of the game instead of eating breakfast hahha Good Morning!"
Wesley Wu, Sent 7:27AM

Thank God for such beautiful friends!
They definitely do a good job of putting smiles on my face :)

happy

there are lots of things that make me happy--
1. novelty: people, jobs, schools, etc. novelty makes my heart sing. i'm not necessarily talking about new things, like new gadgets (although those are fun too!). i'm talking about new experiences! i think those are imperative to living a full life.
2. stories: i love listening to stories. make my ears sing.
3. teamwork: i think this is the #1 reason as to why i like the sports teams i do. it's sad; i do even analyze individuals on teams. i tend not to like teams with "stars," but stars with TEAMS. a good group of guys throwin' a ball around. the american dream!
4. friends: especially the ones i'm going to vegas with. i'm really excited about this trip. :)
5. san francisco: i really do want to settle down in this city eventually. it's without the hustle and bustle of a city like new york, but completely charming!
6. humility: i can learn a lot from these sort of people.
7: people: people that know what adversity really is & have overcome it.
8. luck: i think everyone should have a little; unfortunately that is not always the case :(
9. the number 13: hehehe only because it's nash & ross's jersey #s.
10. nature: always, always, always.
11. the internets!: thank you, al gore ;)
12. my God: because he is everything i could ever hope for in a first love. <3
13. people that upset me: because in those people is my opportunity to become stronger.

i'm going to end with 13 because, well, it's a strong number. ;)

right now. in this moment.

i am so encouraged by the omnipresence of God.

you know what i don't like?

i don't like when people put up cutesy inspirational stories with famous names.
i just read a story about a boy that disproved his professor by turning the professor's argument against God to one FOR God.
And although it was an amazing feat and cute story, i'm not sure if someone recorded that as Albert Einstein.
Oh please.
Give me a fucking break.
It could be Einstein, who knows? But it also didn't have to be... & then you look like a turd.
Anyway.
Yesterday was not a good sports day for me nor is today a good Funday for me. I have to write out a midterm that I neglected to even look at the past weekend in fear of already doing badly on the test (I know, neurotic).
Sooo here I sit on this cloudy day (thank GOD), writing up answers to concepts that I haven't even realized were so deep until now.
At least I have my tea with me. I looove green tea.

gg.

game over?
(i know, i hate hidden messages too... HAHA. deal.)

opened up a can of fucking worms.

now all i can do is wait.
i am not so good at waiting.
i welcome the challenge ;)